WWYD (What would you do)

Last fall, in Spanish, we worked on the conditional sense. We spent an entire class answering hypothetical questions, “What would you do if…” One question was an imaginary situation where you broke something very expensive and it cost your employer money, but nobody knew it was you. Most of the people in my language lab were idealistic 20-year-olds and quick to say that they would confess. I think it’s my age, not my writer-brain, but I first wanted clarification. “Will I lose the job, and it’s my last hope?” “Are my kids starving?” “Is it under an unfair regime, the job is not my choice, and they’ll kill me for failure?” Of course, I do not have that much vocabulary click to continue reading…

Sorry, not really really sorry

I remember in the early years of trying to merge our two fighting styles that my husband and I had an argument. I was quick-tempered but equally fast to see my error and apologize. (I sometimes still struggle with quick anger.) However, in that beginning argument, when I asked for forgiveness, he would not give it. He needed time. A day later, when he was ready to discuss and make up, I wasn’t interested. I wanted a turn with the power imbalance. I wanted him to hurt, or grovel, before I bestowed forgiveness. I realized, though, that withholding meant we might just take turns refusing to forgive. That’s the loading dock to the never speaking again express train. So, I click to continue reading…

I’ll do me

A few weeks ago I heard a younger woman state that she absolutely despised the phrase “You do you.” It surprised me because my first impression of it leaned toward grace: allowing someone to be their true self. When I was traveling last week, I saw the slogan printed on a hotel advertisement at the airport. I find it silly when companies try to give a nod to their relevancy by using something like that—because once something is hip and widely known (meaning: I’ve heard it), it’s rarely used. Because of the advertisement, I couldn’t get it out of my mind. I asked my son what he thought about the phrase and he said it was extremely generous, one of click to continue reading…

I think I may be in a little more pain than most women

I’m trying to learn Spanish and so I added a parallel Spanish Bible to my Olive Tree app. My goal is to read through the New Testament in Spanish. Even though I don’t understand everything yet, it helps me learn. There was a repeated verb I didn’t recognize. Llenar: to fill up. It was intriguing to me how often I saw it. On one side, Jesus kept being “filled with the Spirit” and on the other side, the city or the leaders kept being “filled with rage.” It’s fun how different details jump out with multiple languages and versions. I originally downloaded the free Reina-Valera 1960, but since I have the vocabulary of a small child, I couldn’t understand much. click to continue reading…

Analyzing the Average Four–The Imaginative Aesthete

January is nearing the end and I feel like I did ok with my new year plans. I’m curious, so please share how you fared with your January goals—but I know some people are vehemently against making resolutions. Generally, I do what I feel like doing, and I don’t judge myself too harshly if I don’t make it. Translation: rules are for other people. Resolutions and goals can be really painful for personality types who can’t stand failure or who need to be in the right. (I’m talking to you, Enneagram Ones. I think if you’re an Eight you don’t make a rule, you just do it in your strength.) Don’t read condescension into my tone; it isn’t there. Some click to continue reading…